Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Randomize
