Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
