My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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