At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
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