ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize