I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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