She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
