The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize