Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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