She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
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