I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
