Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Randomize