I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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