Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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