:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
