its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Randomize
