Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
