so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
