She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
