thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
He better not be in your backpack
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
