And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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