our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Randomize
