she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
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