So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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