D3 body, D1 cock
...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
