I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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