woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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