You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
operation harelip BJ is a go
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
the room spins SO much faster in panama
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
