So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize