chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
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