I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
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