You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
