its not stalking. its research.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
