some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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