today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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