areolas are like halos for boobs.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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