she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize