I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
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