we're blogging at a bar
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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