I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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