woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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