well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
