Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
