...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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