why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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