...so i touched it.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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