i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
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