im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
