Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
