I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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