she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Randomize
