Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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